Feminine? Does that mean soft? Is feminine always equated with sexy? Temptress? When do I feel feminine? When do I feel it is okay to be soft, nurturing, gentle?
Discovering my heart is critical. After all, if I don’t know my heart, I can’t give it to the Lord God for His benefit. Neither can I give it to anyone else. I can’t give what I don’t know I am giving. I wouldn’t even know if I truly gave it if I don’t know my heart. So, what does it mean to have the “heart of a woman” and be spiritually transparent to share my feminine heart with those around me?
The dictionary defines feminine as a “set of attributes or characteristics that either gender may exhibit.” So what does feminine look like to you? After much searching and analysis of those individuals I consider feminine, I concluded that for me the characteristics are: kindness—genuine caring for others; positive encouragement for the dreams, goals and desires of others; gentleness—not harsh in their language or masculine in their style, mannerisms, walking or talking. The phrase “talking like a truck driver” comes to mind as something that is not feminine in my mental image.
Feminine is that woman who pursues and encompasses in her life the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5), as well as being willing to be passionate about life and fully present to those she interacts with in life. (Note: please share your comments about what you view as feminine and what it means to share your woman’s heart—all of us can benefit from your journey).
Out of history, Annie Oakley, Dolly Madison, Martha Washington, Molly Pitcher, Queen Elizabeth, Princess Diana, Mother Theresa, Julie Andrews, Sojourner Truth, Jacqueline Onassis, Ella Fitzgerald, Beverly Sills make me think of feminine. None were milk-toast or weak women. None shrunk back from fully being passionate about their values or beliefs. Yet, none resorted to harsh, abrasive conduct to communicate those beliefs. All were activists who did so while being fully women. Passionate women with very different styles and personal characteristics yet, they all model femininity.
So, where/when do I allow that feminine part of me to shine out? When I read God’s Word—I remember I am the Daughter of the King of Kings; His little girl. When I pray, I speak to Him as my Father, my brother and the Lover of my Soul and I am all woman. When I play with a child. When I remember I am God’s beloved. When I cook and bake—I am nurturing, being a caring kind person reaching out with softness. Feminine is where I am being most authentically me—the real me—where my heart is most exposed for others to see God’s grace that has set me free. (Note: I intentionally left out a relationship with a man because that can become a role where we women get mixed messages between what is feminine and what is sexy or sensual—this is about being connected to the heart as a woman, not connected just in a relationship with another who affirms or denigrates us as women).
Lord God, I want my heart to be fully 100% surrendered to You so that when others look at my heart they see Your beauty, Your grace, Your love, Your joy, Your peace—all of the Fruit of the Spirit that flows out of a heart fully devoted to You. Amen
